what i've been reminded of in 2009:

- I am completely obsessed with my family. They are better than any friends I’ve ever made, and I miss them terribly when I’m at school.
- My little sisters are my best friends.
- I was definitely born to be a teacher, but am completely terrified at the thought of starting a career in a year and a half.
- There are a LOT of turkeys and complainers in the world.
- It’s so important to have a great audience of friends on the front row for support.
- Sometimes the best friends you can have will always be thousands of miles away, but true friendship isn’t being inseparable, it’s being separated and nothing changes.
- God is completely invested in my life and knows what’s best for me. I need to work on my relationship with Him in 2010.
- Discipline isn’t so bad when you plan ahead ;]

- As good as I am at pretending, I am pretty darn nervous for Feb. 24th... and I hate unknowns.
- I get the most work done in the morning hours.
- I love going to bed early!
- I am obsessed with change. The idea that I can wake up everyday and become better, improve, and change completely excites me. Now I just need to be more consistent with daily goals. . .
- Facebook is a really ridiculous distraction. I need to monitor my time on there better.
- Sometimes really unfortunate, devastating things happen to good, undeserving people. But everything in this life happens for a purpose and trials bring us closer to our Heavenly Father.
- I shouldn’t live with the same people for more than a year.
- Time goes a lot faster when you’re NOT counting.
- Every time I open the scriptures I find something new and useful, no matter how many times I’ve read a certain part there is always something that pops out I never noticed before. And conveniently, it’s always just what I needed to hear.
- I get grumpy on days when I don’t read my scriptures.
- I’ve found a new love in reading. I love reading a lot more than I used to! I just wish there was time to sit down everyday and read for hours!
- Being different is ok.
- I really miss piano. I can’t believe I’ve let my technique fall from where it used to be. New years resolution is to get it back to where it was senior year in high school!
- There is definitely a problem in being too focused. I need to loosen up and be more social at school.
- Life is better when I am completely confident in myself and my abilities.
- I’m really, really, really sad that my two best buds in Logan are graduating this semester!! Whitney and Melissa, Logan just won’t be the same without you ☹
- I really don’t like being cold, and often I stop and wonder why I decided to live in the frozen tundra of Logan.
- It’s impossible to keep in touch with every friend you’ve ever had in life. Especially the ones I meet now – they come and go.
- I’m SO done with high school and it bothers me when friends I had in high school can’t let go of it.
- I, like Megan said, need to learn from my past and get better at not dwelling in it.

I have a feeling 2010 is going to be an excellent year.

grief

yep, there was definitely a reason we broke up,
and definitely a reason why we will never date again,
no matter how hard he tries. and tries. and tries.
i hate that some people haven't changed a bit since
high school. someday he'll find a wife, someday.

my Cali babe.

just thinking about this today

LEAPers 2008.

LEAPers 2009.

my man Usman.

tim and parker stealin' the talent show.

hillary.sara.julissa.jackie.08.

just hangin' out.

the infamous Alex McRae.

4 coolest, most successful people i've ever met.

dr. bill dorfman. virgil klunder. pam peterson. uncle steve anderson.

i miss this.

bing zang hue le

my annie is in china.
the thought that i can't
text her for 3 weeks is
lonely and sad. i hardly
texted today... haa.
have fun, annie!

you can't buy me, hot dog man.

moral of the story: you can't trust the system.

red van

lately i've been remembering all my dreams really well. and they've been having really random, unrelated people in them. it's crazy. last night, i dreamt that i was supposed to speak at sarah england's farewell. there were 2 musical numbers, a youth speaker, her talk, another musical number, then me. there were hundreds of people in the audience and out in the foyers (packed), all conveniently wearing Hurd Aggie shirts... apparently there was a game afterwards?! the musical number before my talk was "i cannot find my way" from the forgotten carols. the family who was singing it started from the back of the congregation and walked all around the congregation, singing the song. soon, a lot of the congregation started walking around with them. weird. i got up, sobbing, because i love that song so much and it went perfectly with what i wanted to talk about. but right before i got up, my mom had told me my talk was no good and i needed to rewrite it, or at least just follow the spirit and say what is in my heart, not what was written on paper. during sarah's talk i had been frantically trying to write notes and other things i could talk about, so i could please my mom. i got up and nate bendall was in the bishopric, but they couldn't figure out the right height for the pulpit. it was embarrassing. i started talking about coming unto christ and how that song was the perfect segway into my talk... about 3 sentences into my talk, about 3/4 the congregation just gets up and leaves. i, from the pulpit, said, "well, sorry my talk is so boring, hope you have a great day... byeeee" and this guy shouted out, "yeah, we're going to jason's. this is lame." haa. so then i start crying more because everyone hates me and because i'm just emotional already. i keep going, then this blonde dude comes up and messes with the pulpit some more so it's going up and down and i can't read my notes and no once can stop it :( finally the bishop just pulled the pulpit plug and that fixed that. parker and quentin smith then stood up and start playing catch with a tennis ball because they were bored. after what seemed like an eternity, i finally finish up my talk with my testimony, then sat down, completely devastated that my talk was a total disaster and that everyone hated me.

we had a big red van which i convinced my mom to let me drive home. i was, afterall, too late to hear jason speak. hannah got in with me, and we drove. there were so many cars everywhere! we saw nate mensink, my boy from the netherlands, so i got out and gave him a hug and we talked for a bit. while we were talking, that same blonde dude and his girlfriend got in my trunk with this huge box of something, i wasn't sure. i got back in and they wouldn't leave the car, so i decided i would leave the trunk open and maybe they would fall out if i drove crazy enough. so, i did. i swerved in and out of lanes, and tried to make them fall out. when we got up by our church, there were so many cars waiting to get out of the parking lot, i just had to use the left lane. this icicle as big as me fell in front of our car and we had to jump over it, then the cars that were coming our way we had to jump over as well. it was crazy. but the people didn't fall out. we got up by the reich's and there was a line of people barricading the road. all wearing sweatshirts and fabric over their faces straight down so you couldn't see a profile or anything. i decided, since i was in a hurry, that i would just run over them. so i did.

my mom was at the perkins, and she used the force to stop the car. i got out and she was not happy. she asked if i had ever driven this car before and why i was driving so crazy, trying to kill everyone..? i told her about the strangers in the backseat and she said i should've just called the police or gotten nate bendall to come attack them or something. i explained the car was running and they would've stolen it, and hannah was in there with them, but that i would take care of it and go home soon. so we drive to jared johnsen's old house and the people in the back say they need a ride to pizza hut DOWNTOWN for pizza before the aggie game. there was no way i was going to drive down there, but luckily jared came out of the house with a baseball bat and was ready to attack them. they got out the backseat and ran away. thank goodness. i drove home, but on our street everyone was parked like 4 cars across the road, blocking everything. so, i drove over all their cars and crushed all of them. i ran into my garage door and it fell off, then i just pulled into the driveway anyway and parked the car. i think i was going to head over to jason's for the party because i had missed his whole talk in church, but i woke up, so i''ll never know. dreams are crazy. one day i'll write about laci and parker's second wedding.

merry christmas eve! today is my favorite day of the year, hands down!!

"i love piled up snow on the window pane"

...says julia.

new head band from allie.

tomorrow is my favorite day of the whole year.

most excited for cheese bricks, talent show, slide show, and pjs.

lovely christmas cookies tonight.

9 weeks tomorrow.

utes win poinsettia bowl game tonight. i love my utes.

wish we could've gone to san diego for the game!

dreamt about laci's second wedding last night. not success.

"stop hannah. that's only funny when sara and i do it." - i love juje.

this break i don't miss much about logan, which is

frightening in a strange and somewhat profound way.

argyle needs another makeover. candy canes have got to go.

the day after christmas is the second worst day of the whole year.

(the last day of LEAP is the worst day of the whole year.)

snowmobiling with dr bill on new years eve. stoked.

grandpa got facebook. definitely hip as ever.

if brennon nelson lived in utah we'd be dating.

i miss you like crazy, brennon!! can't wait for august :]

costco with my daddy today. best date ever.

wish i could explain why i love moose in the house so much.

wasted too much time today reading mylifeisaverage.com

jason brown is home. weird as ever, but home.

boren lied to me today. but i still love him.

ems and i never made gingerbread houses. no bueno.

definitely on track to gain that 10 pounds this holiday season.

did i mention i don't want to go back to school?!

got a job yesterday. i've worked really hard to make the next semester

a busy one, just the way i love it. i only have 4 classes, which is

weird, but goal achieved. bring on spring 2010.

except not yet. let's have christmas first . . .

wesley called me today. pleasant surprise. date with griffin saturday.

i was going to go to bed at 10. it's now 11. boo.

"bring me back my winterlove"

we play guess who

this is my great, amazing, wonderful friend
allie

she's kinda really pretty awesome. i'm real glad we're buddies.
we played guess who tonight.and 1313 dead end drive. and moose in the house. just cuz we're cool like that.

chriiiiiiistmas eve

christmas eve is in a short 3 days,

ladies and gentlemen. 3 days.

can't wait for this...

to do list

every christmas.

eat ridiculous amounts of sugar.

gain 10 pounds and not care.

sing christmas songs in sleep.

make a gingerbread house.

build a snowfamily.

read the forgotten carols.

sweet rolls for christmas breakfast.

read 25 christmas stories by the tree.

chug 3 glasses of hot chocolate in one sitting.

make mom happy-cry with present.

watch every christmas movie we own.

manheim steamroller christmas morning.

sleepover in coleman's room.

office marathon.

sing-along with reader's digest book.

catch up on journal.

make new years resolutions.

see the lights downtown.

visit bible street and christmas street.

christmas eve at grammy's.

christmas brunch with grandparents.

go caroling.

eat sister bodily's fudge.

skyline high christmas choir concert.

motab christmas concert.

christmas carol play.

listen to christmas music 24/7.

deliver neighborhood gifts with dad.

learn a new piano christmas song.

spend first moments of new year in air.

interview

experienced the longest job interview

of my life yesterday. 45 minutes.

definitely a LEAP success though.

and i guess that's all that matters.

touchsmart600

so... there's this hp touchsmart600 PC contest going on right now in the mommy blogging world. though i've definitely converted to mac in the past couple years, this computer looks amazing! just from what i've read about it, i am eager to have one in my possession! i would definitely use this in my first elementary school classroom. it is easy-to-use and the kids love the interaction with their fingers right on the screen. as a teacher just starting out, it's tricky to build up your classroom supplies and tools on a nearly-broke post-college student budget. i hope i win the sweepstakes!!

excellENCE at christmas.

2008.

FRUITCAKE

top ten uses for fruitcake:

10. use instead of sand bags during el nino.

9. send to us air force, let troops drop it.

8. use as railroad ties.

7. two words: pin cushion.

6. use as speed bumps.

5. collect ten and use as bowling pins.

4. use instead of cement shoes.

3. save for next summer's garage sale.

2. use slices in next skeet shooting competition

1. use slices to hold up that wobbly table.

i've never had fruitcake before... is it any good? ha ha...

psychiatric christmas

here are some psychiatrically-challenged

christmas carols for your reading enjoyment:

schizophrenia: do you hear what i hear?

multiple personality disorder: we 3 kings disoriented are

dementia: i think i'll be home for christmas

narcissistic: hark, the herald angels sing about me

manic: deck the halls and walls and house and lawn and streets and stores and office and town and cars and busses are trucks and trees and fire hydrants and...

paranoid: santa claus is coming to get me

ocd: jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock, jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock, jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock, jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock...

passive-aggressive personality: on the first day of christmas, my true love gave to me (then took it all away)

borderline personality disorder: thoughts of roasting on an open fire

--dezert-rose.com

dentist. bleck.

going to the dentist is my LEAST favorite thing to do.

that explanation is probably a story for another time.

but today, i had to go get 5 cavities filled. and tomorrow,

i have to go back to get 4 more filled on the other side.

why so many, you may ask? because my last dentist

didn't clean out my freakin' teeth before he put the

freakin' sealants on, so there's been 6 years of decay

going on underneath. no bueno. needless to say

it was not a good day. i'm always grumpy when i

have to go to the dentist. and today, to make things

even worse, they had to give me 3 shots and the last

one totally made me eye and eyebrow go numb. so...

the whole right side of my face is paralyzed and i keep

drooling on myself and i'm starving but i can't eat anything

because i don't want to bite my face off. no bueno.

boo dentist. boo. here's my lovely face. it makes me giggle.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha:

perhaps i shall post one tomorrow of the other side. ;]
blahhhh

home?

distance is pretty depressing.

melissa k: el paso, TX
emily: provo, UT
annie: eden prairie, MN
jackie: los angeles, CA
whitney: boise, ID
jackie: springville, UT
jason: latvia (till friday!)
michael: bangor, ME
jordan: lima, peru
preston: freakin' west indies
liz: syracuse, UT

someday i wish we could all live in the same city.
i'll be home for christmas... missing you...

72 days.

need you now.

picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor

i wonder if i ever cross your mind?

for me, it happens all the time.

it's a quarter after one, i'm all alone

and i need you now.

and i don't know how i can do without

i just need you now.

tough times.

it's been a weekend of breaking news and downright devastation. it's weekendslike this when i am hit with a ton of bricks with the realization that the world is real andsometimes really unfortunate things happen to perfectly good people, often when we least expect them. thank goodness for the knowledge of the eternities and a heavenly father who loves and cares for us always, but is particularly willingto comfort us in our times of greatest need.
camille, jackie, and annie, i am praying for you, and haven't been able to stopthinking about you all weekend. can't believe my two best friends, and a very dear one too, are going through such tough times all in the same week. i love you!

it's real.

she got raped?
has she really been dealingwith this all alone?
you never think it'll happento someone you love so much,or even just know...my stomach sank last night.i haven't been able toconcentrate since.

muppets. could we love them more?

as parker said, this should make you smile:


>

happy bohemian christmas! he he.

madrigals

the skyline high christmas concert does it for me every year.

reminds me how much i honestly and dearly miss madrigals.

but not only mads. but concert choir, highlites, and even

all the accompanying i had to do. gundy was right. those

are the moments of high school you remember forever.

singing the alumni numbers up there on stage always

makes me so excited and reminiscent of junior and senior

year, when choir ruled my life and defined the best moments

in my high school existence. then talking to gundy tonight?

favorite. such a legacy he's leaving. i love that he loves me,

tells me no piano player since me has come along that even

begins to compare. i miss that. he's one of those teachers

that makes you feel great about yourself (when you're lucky

enough to be on his good side, heh heh). and seeing all the

alumni and friends and connections afterwards, and even

during... skyline high is the best place to grow up. choir

may seem nerdy, but i wouldn't trade my choir friends

for the world. i got to stand by my not-so-little brother

coleman during silent night alumni. almost started crying.

he's the mads president this year... and i'm so proud of him!

and to think, it was like pulling teeth to get him to try out

for troubs sophomore year. you can thank me later, coleman.

can't wait until may when they perform mads on broadway,

just like we did. tonight was a good night. christmas wouldn't

be christmas without skyline choir christmas concert. love.

today, i am a bum

why? because i didn't feel like doing a thing.
so, i didn't. woke up at 7, laid in bed, then on
the couch, reading. i was going to work out.
but didn't. i was going to start the software
testing. but didn't. just laid in bed and read.
finally decided to shower at 1:00. and the
best part about it all is, i didn't feel guilty.

christmas break is the best.

frequent driver miles

i feel like i should be awarded some sort of

frequent driver miles award for the most

times driving back and forth between logan

and salt lake in the shortest amount of time.

case in point:

last saturday. to salt lake with tatum.

saturday afternoon: back to logan.

sunday night: to salt lake with david.

monday morning: back to logan.

tuesday afternoon: to salt lake with daddy.

next wednesday afternoon: back to logan.

next saturday: to salt lake with mom.

seriously? i could drive it with my eyes closed.

rest in peace fall 09.

finished up fall 09 semester last night.

what a semester it was! i, like whitney ward,

found this semester of college one of the most

inspiring and life-applicable semesters yet. it's

so great to be taking all classes that i am very

interested in and enjoy and want to learn from.

although completely exhausting, my weeks in

the dear lincoln elementary were definitely a

highlight of the semester, and perhaps even

college altogether! i miss those little 2nd

graders so much. . . and pretty sure i read

those cards they made me at least once a week.

maybe i should feel the same way about the

kindergarteners... ha ha. oops. anyway. whit

and i convinced our reading teacher to let us

take the final early so we could be done monday

rather than late thursday. best decision ever.

so here i am - home for the holidays! it's funny

because my sisters tend to think it's a national

holiday whenever i'm home (love it) and don't

want to do any work or practicing... which is

tough for both of us because 1. they are in

school until the 23rd, and go back the 3rd.

i am home now until jan. 10th. ha ha. also,

being home alone all day, i get really anxious

to play with them when they get home, but

they always have homework and practicing

and have to go to bed early. you'd think the

college student would be the one with all the

work to do. best. and allie is leaving me for

a cruise... which is lame. but exciting for her!

so my mom and i are going to have lots of fun

adventures together. i'm actually really, really

excited about it. it's not very often you get that

amazing woman all to yourself :) and of course

it's so nice to be here to see all the madrigals

performances and jazz band concerts and orchestra

concerts and help with christmas projects in

4th grade. i love home. in case you didn't know.

my family is one of the very most prized parts of

my short life. merry christmas! it's going to be a

great month. p.s. 76 days and counting! ;]

makeover

i gave my blog a makeover tonight.

further changes to come.

for now, i must sleep.

goodnight moon!

it's a typical situation

an all too typical situation in aparty numba fiveee.

Lies.

by sara ence, april '06

Observation proved sorry results.
Skeptical to face truth,
I searched for reason not to believe it.
Impossible.

Attention starved and control desperate,
his slow, steady downfall began.
Not today, but too long ago.
A self-destructive collapse
no one predicted or
could stop if they wanted,
even if he wanted.

Small lies slipped into subconscious truths:
hypnotizing good judgment and memory,
paralyzing all ability to recount
what happened, remember
who said what,
when it happened,
or if it had happened at all.

Creating fantasy, writing his tale
the way he wanted it to be,
the way he thought people wanted it to be.
Willing to forfeit reputation for
translucent shields of deception and deceit.
Only so people would think he’s the best,
the manliest, most outgoing, bravest.

Being anything else would be surrender,
so much more faceable than
what they would think if he weren't fake.

Time wasted on a person he's not,
development of truth absent.

The art of mask creation perfected through
through pathetic stories growing into bigger
and better outlandish coincidence, altogether
banning him from what he could be living,
why he was living. Why was he living?

Someday, he'll vanish into nothing,
forfeiting pure, imagined joy to years of fantasy.
Left with regret, anxiety, and empty stories -
Was he the best? Did he convince?
What is he now?

A lie.

dinner dilemma

so we had this presidency dinner for our lovely

sorority tonight. i've been trying to get a hold of

our advisor for two days now to see if things were

good and she was ready, or if she needed any help.

finally, at 5:45pm today she answered the phone.

here's how our conversation went.

sister younker: "hello sara ence!"

sara: "hi, how are you?"

sy: "good, how about yourself?"

s: "great, i've been trying to get a hold of you

all day now!"

sy: "oh, sorry my phone was dead and i didn't have

a place to charge it."

s: "oh, that's ok. just wanted to make sure you were

all set for tonight?!"

sy: (abnormally long pause...) "what's tonight?"

s: (small freak out and stomach drop, then spoken

with hesitancy...) "the presidency dinner?"

sy: (gasp) "oh, is that tonight?!"

s: (almost starts crying. more long pauses) "umm..."

sy: "oh i'm kidding. i'm pulling your leg. things are

going well, just trying to finish up last minute things.

hopefully we'll be ready when you get here!"

and it's not even april fools day. not cool, sister younker,

not cool. about gave the dear president a heart attack. sigh.

what to choose, what to choose.

ok, really? lately i've struggled with the

"good, better best" thing. it seems that all kinds

of better and even best things are conflicting...

making it very difficult to choose between all

of them. such as tuesday night. IWA Christmas

fireside: 7:00pm. last night of institute and discussion

on the Atonement (allegedly the best class... our

teacher's been talking it up all semester): 7:00pm.

last night: byu vs. usu basketball game: 7:00pm.

american festival chorus required choir rehearsal

for upcoming christmas concert: 7:00pm. the

forgotten carols performance that i was supposed

to work at, and really wanted to so i could watch

cuz christmas season isn't complete without fc: 7:00.

not to mention sunday december 27. ben taylor's

mission farewell: 1:00pm. sarah england's mission

farewell: 1:00pm. jason brown's mission home-

coming: 1:00pm. the singles ward: 1:00pm.

fail.

so... how do you choose?!

december?

oh hey, december!

didn't see ya coming.

hair is a bother

today i want to
shave my head.
don't ask me why.
i just do.

isn't that exciting?

i am realizing lately one reason why

i absolutely love my major: because education

is completely focused on

motivation.

change.

improvement.

success.

{ i've become quite obsessed with

the concept of change lately. }

"the purpose of education is not knowledge,

but results producing actions." --steve anderson

why do we learn if we don't plan to act on what we acquire?

yesterday i talked with jane at spencer's house.

jane is my role model. in more ways than one. i have

yet to meet a more positive, friendly, accepting, inspiring

person. when i talk with her i leave practically glowing

with excitement, inspiration, and motivation to be a better

person, simply because i know her. we talked about this

semester: how our goals from LEAP were unfolding, and

individual successes. starts, for me: mastering a daily schedule

that i've fallen completely in love with. for her: doing

things that previously scared her. and on and on.

i mentioned i've been pleased with my success in the things i've

been working on and this, of course, led to a discussion about

how inspiring change is.

{ "i feel like there are so many things i want to change,

to improve on, to grow, to learn, to know!" i said to her.

"isn't it exciting?!" she replied. }

it was the perfect jane thomas response.

but it really got me thinking. it's true. the fact

that we have so much to learn and know and do and

improve upon and change is, to me, on of the most motivating,

exciting things out there! call me nerdy, but that's why

i read books like "launching a leadership revolution",

"the servant", "blink", and "the tipping point" in my spare time.

because i'm completely inspired by the excitement of change

and learning, coming to those results that produce actions.

i just finished an extensive research paper on an amazing

education pioneer, ann l. brown. her work redefined education

in the oakland area. she finds it inspiring that children are

completely motivated by the need to understand and succeed.

we all have the innate need and desire to make sense

of the world around us. and that desire feeds into our

need to understand and succeed. it is visible in children.

why do we lose it? where does it go? why do we complain

about educational opportunities or projects or tests, when

the whole purpose of education is to inspire change?

"if you want your education to be

tailored to you, ask questions."

education exists to motivate, change, and improve people,

all while helping them find their way to succeed. personal success.

a good friend of mine, amanda burri, once said,

"i merely wish to inspire, be inspired,

and aspire to be something aspired."

though simple, i find this statement completely inspiring in and

of itself, and have therefore adopted it not only as my teaching motto, but

as a motto for my life, next to

"you teach who you are before you teach what you know."

[ the educational world is full of great quotations...hah ]

tonight as i sit and read my final article for my

historical, social, and cultural foundations of education

class, i came across the following, which further

embodies why i find education so motivating and change

so empowering. social activism and change are real, all we

need is the hope, determination, motivation, and understanding

to persist and pursue that which we as humans need most.

"hope is not the same as joy when things are going well,

or willingness to invest in enterprises that are obviously

headed for early success, but rather an ability to work

for something to succeed. hope is definitely not the same

thing as optimism. it's not the conviction that something

will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes

sense, regardless of how it turns out." --vacval havel

if the purpose of education is not knowledge, but

results producing actions, then maybe, just maybe,

hope is our starting point. do we have the hope we

need? the hope to make sense of our world. the hope

to motivate us to change. the hope to empower us

in our quest to succeed. the hope to ignite that

excitement surrounding the ongoing journey

to inspire and be inspired by the way we teach,

through who we are, not what we know.

thank you.

endless.

"the opportunities

to change lives

and even destinies

are endless."

turkeys and stuff

h a p p y

t h a n k s g i v i n g !

tallie's feathers represent

lots and lots of things

liz, tate, whit, and i

are thankful for!

that's great.

home for thanksgiving '09 this week!

this is why i love my major. classes cancelled

while everyone else has to be there. it's great.

strangely though, i feel like i'm home for christmas

break already. maybe because the snow. or the music.

or the lights. i can't decide yet. but i like it.

i feel like this means 2 christmas breaks

would be a really great idea. this is the year.

{ also, not having a car makes for lots of interesting

experiences in transportation to and from logan,

with all sorts of people imaginable. it's great.

this weekend: got to ride down with

melissa k's parents, of all people...

though nervous, it was definitely pleasant,

and i found their company quite agreeable.

i don't think i've ever been happier to be home. }

went to nursery yesterday.

then to see parker and laci speak.

family dinner was excellent,

and carols around the piano.

after a rousing game of curses

and an early bedtime, i can tell

it's going to be a great week.

ps i really, really like my family.

sharon creech says:

"so much depends upon

a red-headed mailman

walking up the drive

holding a blue postcard."

"so much depends upon

a black kitten

in a straw basket

under the Christmas tree."

white van

this morning the bus was late. at 7:13 a large white van pulled up. the driver said, "this is route 4 today." we all skeptically looked at each other. my mom taught me never to get in a scary white van with strangers. but somehow i got in anyway.weirdest bus ride to school ever.

{ this should be a private post }

tonight both my recent alex's

went facebook official

with their relationships.

cool.

or not.

dear miss ence,

dear miss ence,

wen i get home i will cry. i will miss you. i hope you will come back. goodbye!

-chase

dear miss ence,

you wer asam. thank for reading. thanks for teacheng. love luke

der mis ence

i hope you haf a good time. i will miss you wen you are gon. you hav fun. i love you, you have helpt me if i had a hed acke or sick. i had so so much fun with you. i want to cry. i will rely rely rely miss you. i rele want to cry. i love you. love, madison

miss ence

i wander wich skool you go to? wer ever you go well miss you i hope you have fun. i hope in your school you will go to a trip. and you mitte fined a ipopodanes (hippopotamus) maby you can come visit us befor you go and we gave you a hug. we had fun with you, pleasae stay here. were guna miss miss ence. pleasae pleasae stay. we love you to read to us. remember me, skyler, madison, and colten. and miss voth. the end. lots of love jose.

dear mrs. ence,

you have been a great teacher. you have been a good friend to everyone. you show lots of kindness in your heart to everyone. your favorite color is blue. your 33 years old. your favorite animal is a hippo. i will miss you very much. your burthday is may 5th. i hope you will have an exciting live. we will miss you vert much. love, jordan

dear miss ence,

we did lots together including the south anerican report (which was fun). i enjoyed being with you and i hope you did to. i learned a lot from you, and i hope you learned a lot. ps, Jethro.

dear miss ence, i hope you are going to havan. i love you. thanck you for making me feel good about me. love tabitha.

jeans today, dress tomorrow.

the 100 days

it's official.

we're hitting

the

double digits

tomorrow.

let the

100 days

countdown

begin.

now.

life is fragile

i am so grateful for the knowledge i have of the gospel.

little daniel nielson was born this week, and died this week.

it's been hard to come to grips with. but i believe it's part of a plan.

some spirits don't need to be tested. they just need a body.

and so many tender mercies, miracles, experiences, comforts,

and blessings have attended to the parents and family this week,

and i know the knowledge of those can comfort us as well.

god holds us in the palms of his hands, and intends to take

us step by step through every trial or hardship we face. we are

never alone. not even in our darkest times. in fact, i believe we can

feel him best when we are in our darkest times.

i find great comfort in that.

"children are an heritage of the lord" and sometimes they just

don't need to experience earth life. though i may not understand

this completely, i do take courage in the fact that he will be in the

celestial kingdom someday. just like aunt debbie, who was 3 days,

and cousin jacob, stillborn, both with holes in their hearts.

life is so fragile and unexpected. but god has a plan for each of us.

and that plan is so carefully and individually crafted with love deeper

than we can even imagine. pres uchtdorf said in the last conference:

"think of the most all-consuming love you can

imagine, then multiply that by an infinite amount.

that's the measure of god's love for you."

i love that. and i love that i know that. and i love him for loving me.

i can't help but smile when i think about the lord scooping

daniel back into his arms on friday. may he live with god in peace.

but... what will i do?

s: "but… what will i do when i wake up tomorrow and realize you're really gone?"

m: "i'll wake up with the same realization. we're in this together."

s: "but… what if you forget what i look like?"

m: "i'll take the best picture of us with me."

s: "but… what will i do when i just want a hug?"

m: "i'll give you my sweatshirt to hug whenever you want."

s: "but… what will i do when i want talk to you everyday?"

m: "i'll write you letters and you will write back."

s: "but… what will i do if all the sudden i think of something i want to text you and tell you right away, or even just say i'm thinking of you?"

m: "i'll send you a postcard when i think of you and tell you everything i would've said in that text. and you will do the same."


. . . i got a postcard yesterday. . . :D

firsts.

for some reason today i was thinking all about freshman year. leaving salt lake and all i held dear to come to chilly logan for school. sometimes i don't know what got into me when deciding to move out and start a new life on my own. but i don't regret it, i've learned SO much up here and it's the greatest school in the world. perfect for me. freshman year brought so many firsts:

our first day of freedom.


first moving day.


first aggie sporting event.

first blind date.

first student ward fhe.


first posse.


first college dance.


and now, here we are, two and a half years and 20 pounds later:


freshman year feels like an eternity ago.
i only have 3 semesters left. i can't believe it.
time sure flies when you're having fun :)

{ ap-ple, sauce }

... my first attempt at
homemade applesauce
today was a smashing success...

physics sandbox

i don't know why i find this so amusing, but i do.

i am destined for second grade.

today, second grade was an adventure:

- meghan stuck an earring IN her ear. we had to tweeze it out.

5 min later she said her ear hurt. forgetting you can't use sarcasm

with kids, i said, "i wonder why?" she said, "well, miss ence, it's

because i just had an earring in there...duh..."

- jacob told me he was going to eat my children... in german...

- jethro finished his south america project. i have never seen

anyone so excited to present a power point as that boy. love.

- shaylee said i'm her "favorite person possibly in the whole utah".

- travis said people look at him funny because he's a

"clown class, or something," and because he can do accents.

- someone asked me for "hannatizer" to clean their hands.

- nayeli and i counted money forEVER. i said "3 quarters is how much?

75 cents" more than i planned today. that's just not something you wake

up and decide you're going to do.

- a little boy told me his mom put him in the trunk last night when the

cops came over because she was drunk. scary... :-/

- sloppy joes for lunch. is it frightening that i enjoy school lunch?

- jordan told me how nancy drew solved her newest mystery. i've been

getting updates all along, but she finally cracked the code!

- shaylee and jordan attacked me in the hall. i love kid hugs.

- tabitha and i spent a lovely (long) time reading about kim and vic,

competing for the longest jumper title. tabitha reminds me of hannah.

- we started "george's marvelous medicine", at request of karina. love it.

- when i told them i only had three days left in their class jayden cried.

- only 2 absent kids today, as opposed to the usual 7-9.

- in art they made "corunpocias", because it's almost thanksgiving.

i really, really like second grade.

furthermore, in college land:

- it snowed. so i wore my tennis shoes to college reading.

they make we walk faster, i'm convinced.

- learned that the walk home in the snow is loooong,

even with fast-walking tennis shoes on.

- almost stepped on lindsey's dinner coming out of reading.

- realized i need to work on my teacher handwriting.

- saw dr. hunsaker booking it to the car in a suit and briefcase.

i giggled a lot. maybe the way he was running? i don't know.

- the bus was extra awkward today. all this bad weather and

still no one has anything to talk about...

- it's 5:15 and almost pitch black outside. not ok.

- top ramen for dinner for the first time in about a year.

- saw three freshmen boys huddled under a TINY umbrella

walking to the fieldhouse. then saw them again on their way back.

i couldn't help but chuckle, they looked hilarious and made my day.

i honestly love college.

happy #21, miss 10!

today, november 11, 2009, is the lovely

annie carney's birthday! #21!

annie is of one my best friends.

love you, girlie!

tuna tuna

today before work i was sitting on a couch.

in the fine arts building. it started smelling real

strongly of tuna. i looked around. then it went away.

so i kept reading. but then it came back, stronger this

time. i looked around again. after some searching i

found a bag of opened tuna sitting behind the couch

in front of me. clearly half eaten, with a spoon? i don't

know who eats tuna alone... but i almost threw up.

it was gross. but seriously, hidden behind a couch?

who does that?

stick to it?

the status quo is

totally

uninspiring.